Ancient Cheerleader Manual Reveals Secrets To Making Classmates Jealous

April 14th, 2009 by admin

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You have probably thought about being a cheerleader, but may think that you’re right not for the job. Nonsense! If you can speak English, dress appropriately and pretend to like your school, anything is possible!

An archeologist at the Kansas City newspaper The Pitch, dug up this old book from 1983 that tells aspiring cheerleaders everything they need to know about how to join the pep squad and fight off the jealous stares of all your former friends you’ll have to leave behind. Some helpful hints:

Don’t assume that you must be dazzling … If you don’t believe this, take a look at the squad of cheerleaders in your school. You may find a few knockouts, but there most likely will be some boys and girls who are average kids….

“If you are heavy and have tried losing weight but are just one of those kids who is going to be big and beautiful no matter what, go ahead and try out for the squad.

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