Wednesday, March 17, 2010

March 17th, 2010 by

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Homeless Jerry’s Cement Toes!

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Drunk, high dad leaves baby in oven overnight, police say

Dog attacks police car

Alleged Anthony Affair Reveals Intensity Of Case

Deputies play waiting game, finally arrest robbery suspect

Woman beaten in NYC bar after rejecting advances

This is your loyal blind scribe,
with today’s recap.
Enjoy, Lawrence

This recap is dedicated to Janie Cakes, as she’s recovering from a
heart attack. The Bubba Army wishes you a speedy recovery.

Segment 1 – Homeless Beer Challenge explained, various callers

The show started with “Soul Kitchen” by The Doors as bumper music.
Bubba said the music was provided by Brent, Ned thinks it’s a clogger.
Bubba said Calgary will be before New Orleans, Manson wonders if this
is from thousands of emails, Spice thinks it’s based on ten emails
from the same person. Bubba said they have to rent all of their stuff,
he thinks he shouldn’t have said that, he said they’ll probably take
that Friday off, they’ll use that for the meet and greet, he thinks
they’ll have the date by today, he then plugged the Homeless Green
Beer Challenge, the twist is that they’ll be drinking the beer they
were previously sitting in, they’ll then be giving cups to drink from
the pool. If one of the participants has to use the bathroom, it’s a
$25 fine. Tower Dog in t. Meyers said he just came back to Ft. Meyers
last night, he said the station has a new connection, he said one of
the guys had a Bubba Army flag on top of the tower, he said it should
be up for about a week. Bubba wondered why he can’t keep it up all the
time; the guy said the tower will be coming down. Cameron said he’s
looking forward to seeing the guys in Calgary, the guy said they have
no fear in traveling cross country for something they love. Bubba
thinks it would be amazing to perform in front of thousands of people,
he thinks Spice and Manson should leave the studio during the Kevin
Harvick interview; they then went to commercials a few seconds later.


Segment 2 – Emails

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for BubbaRaw.com. We then
heard “Country Boys Can Survive”, Bubba thinks they could do a parody
of it. We then heard Ned’s “If Your Irish Then Fuck You” from “the Ned
CD” track 19, and “Holiday CD” disc 2, track 11. N the song, Ned
bashes the Irish for being who they are. The first email of the day
asked when the NC double D’s contest ends, Bubba said it’s today.
Another emailer asked Bubba to discuss a bill that will stop
retirement, House Bill 1543. Another emailer wondered if they’ll have
a date for Calgary and Toronto, he thinks he’ll have Calgary before
Toronto. Another emailer said Andrew Wilkow really put the guys over,
saying the guys were men’s men, Bubba said Andrew is a nice guy, he
said he’s one of the coolest Conservatives. Another emailer told bubba
they’ll have no problem filling the Calgary event. Another emailer
thanked Bubba for his advice to the caller from yesterday; Bubba
thinks the emailer makes a lot of sense. Another emailer said the show
will have no problem selling out Calgary, Bubba said they’ll be doing
it after the stampede. Another emailer said Barry Gibbs sang, not
Andy. Another emailer said they wouldn’t miss Calgary for the world.
Another emailer said Bubba’s old basketball team will be playing in
the Semi-state game, he thinks high school basketball was ruined about
ten years ago, he said it was ruined based on having different
categories, he said basketball in Indiana is like Religion. Another
emailer wondered what happened to Faggot Terry, the guys weren’t sure,
Bubba thinks he was like the male Anna Nicole Smith. Another emailer
said in the drop-down menu on AshleyMadison.com doesn’t include Bubba.
Another emailer said Calgary will look like a parking lot. The last
email of the day was from Gary Willetts, the guy who won the Camero,
confirming that he’ll be there. They then went to commercials a few
seconds later.


Segment 3 – Various stuff

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for “NC Double D’s”. Bubba
said a lot of the main stream media will be pandering; he wonders why
the news guys are wearing kilts. We then heard “Spanky’s St. Patrick’s
Day” from “Bubba’s Holiday Classics Vol. 2”, track 13, and “Holiday
CD” disc 2, track 18. Events include:

1. 9:00 – Spanky painting his testicals green, the first twenty
females get to drink free after kissing them.
2. 10:00 – Dressing Man well up like Lucky the Leprecon, giving him an
Irish Cream enema, then beating him with a bar of Irish spring,
stuffed in a sock.
3. 11:00 – The “Lick me Charms Wet Lassie Irish” contest, where the
girls are squirted with O’Doul’s, pouring Lucky Charms on them, and
the five guys lick them off.
4. Midnight – Fifteenth annual Irish jig contest, where Spanky offers
$50,000 for the best Irish jig.

We then heard “The Brady Bunch” theme, Bubba said Greg Brady was in
the news, Spice said he didn’t grow up watching it, Bubba said it was
one of those things you couldn’t miss, he wonders if people knew that
Robert Reed was gay, he thinks they should’ve done an episode
featuring the other families, ned thinks Alice the made was a dike.
Bubba said that Greg Brady’s ex has been talking about him, we then
heard a news clip about that, Bubba thinks Barry Williams will do any
interview, he thinks you’re a real dick if you can’t have sex with
your woman and tell her it’s over after, he then got side tracked by
Tiger Woods on TV. Spice said he had her sign an ending agreement,
Bubba thinks she’s a mark, Spice said he saw the woman in the clip
dancing in Vegas, he said if he was a woman, he’d be ashamed to admit
that she dated him, Bubba thinks the world will smack him in the face,
Manson said he can’t wait for Tiger to be heckled, Brent said whoever
does that will get thrown out, Manson said it’ll be worth it. Spice
said that he’s got a great idea, but he’s afraid to say it, Bubba told
him not to say it on air. Bubba said that George Anthony is denying
claims that he had an affair, we then heard a news clip about that,
Bubba thinks it’s the biggest dick move ever. Spice said if the affair
is true, it’ll turn into something else. Bubba thinks the grand
parents won’t be in jail, we then heard a clip of Bubba saying that if
she fires the first shot, it’s over. Tim wondered about Bubbapalooza
Toronto, Bubba thinks they’ll have a date by Monday, he then read that
Tiger has lost about fifty million dollars, Spice thinks he’ll just
get new sponsors. Bubba said he thought the run-away car in California
was a shakedown, it’s been discovered that a guy named James sikes
filed for bankruptcy, the guys think he’s looking for a pay day. Bubba
said he’s tried to get a hold of John Gallagher, the request for the
interview was denied, it was a hand-written “no thanks”, he said he’d
like to get all county comitioner on the show, Spice thinks he’ll get
shot down. We then heard a news clip about a judge blocking the
footage of the whale killing the training, Spice said he can see where
the family is coming from. We then heard “Wild Whale” from “bubba Show
Classics Vol. 13”, track 18. They then went to commercials a few
seconds later.


Segment 4 – Homeless guys in studio

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for Bubbapalooza in New
Orleans. Bubba asked if the homeless guys were there, Spice said that
one of them was a no show, we then heard a Carl Harris produced bumper
about that. Bubba said the pool has four kegs of Miller Lite, he said
the guys don’t care about anything except for alcohol, Spice said they
sometimes have to keep the homeless guys under control, Bubba said to
some guys, three beers will make you pee, while others see it as a
warm up he said they’ll have a $200 prize, every time someone gets out
of the pool, it’s a $25 fine, he thinks having one of the guys in the
wheelchair is genius, he said they have 100 extra Wonkas. Hammil said
Andy is in the wheelchair, Bubba wonders if they’ve seen him before,
Spice thinks Andy has a great set up. The new guy came in, named
Jerry, he said he’s been homeless since 1998, he said he laid
concrete, he said azma made him stop work, he said he smokes a lot.
Spice thinks he would look like a Presidential candidate, Bubba thinks
they should call him Homeless Ronald Ragon. Spice wondered what his
biggest worry is, Jerry said there’s a lot of a woman, he said they’re
practically giving it away on Kennedy, Manson thinks he’s homeless
player. Bubba asked him when the last time he had sex was, jerry said
about a week ago, he said he doesn’t use protection, he said if he
catches something, he’ll die with it. Andy said that his name was
Andy, and that’s all he was going to say. Spice thinks he has great
with facial hair, jerry said $125 is good, Spice thinks Andy’s pubic
hair growth is something. Bubba explained the contest, Andy said he’s
not drinking with Jerry, he said he’s not his cup of tea, Bubba thinks
they’ll just sit there and make no money, he thinks Miller did a bait
and switch on them. Spice asked jerry what was up with his toenails,
Jerry said it’s seament poisoning. Bubba asked that they get the guys
in the pool, he hopes Andy has a better attitude, Andy said he’s been
thinking about it. Jerry said he went from 220-160, Manson thinks he’s
a homeless Tommy Lee Jones, Jerry said he smoked some crack last
Christmas, he said he got 5 rocks of it, saying the high was pretty
good, he thinks heroin is the best, he said he quit in 1976. Manson
said he’d vote for him, Bubba thinks jerry hasn’t lied about anything,
Manson said the guy almost fell. Bubba said he’s so used to the new CD
player, we then heard Corey Haim’s Mom calling 911, Spice thinks this
is the 911 call for his career, Bubba said his family was a part of a
911 call, Spice goofed on the 911 guy’s voice. Bubba said in his
career, he’s had to share some stuff that is a little uncomfortable,
he said it’s part of their lives, he said his family will get through
this, he said his Mom had a heart attack last night, she’s in
intensive care, he said he’s very upset over it, he said he’s in the
now business, he hopes he makes it, he thinks she wouldn’t want him to
do anything else but be there. They then went to commercials a few
seconds later.


Segment 5 – Homeless Green Beer Challenge

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for the BubbaRaw.com
dollar preview. Bubba told Spice and Manson they could leave during
the Kevin Harvick interview. We then heard the Green Beer Challenge
bumper, Spice it’s a little cold outside, Bubba thinks he needs a tan,
he said a dog was licking on him, he asked the guys what’s up with the
dog, Jerry said his dog is named Cocoa, he said he gets about five
bags of dog food, he said he’s eaten it before, he said you have to
get a license to pan handler. Andy said he’s not drinking, as he’s
sitting next to some homeless guys, Spice thinks he’ll be thirsty,
Jerry said if he farts, it’ll come up like ice cubes. The current
count was jerry with 2 cups, Joe with one and Andy with one, Bubba
thinks Jabber Jaw is like jerry Lewis with the tote board, Joe said he
was going to let it ride. Spice said when you have to pee, let them
know, Andy asked for another beer. Miller said the grand prize was
$175, Bubba said he’s never stood the homeless guys up with money, he
said for every time you have to pee you get $20 for going in the pool.
Spice said Bubba should look at jerry’s toes, Bubba thinks it’s just
funk, jerry described his tattoos, one of his wife, he said ten years
in jail caused their break up, Spice thinks he’s like John Wayne,
bubba thinks they should call him the Homeless John Wayne. Jerry said
it was in new Mexico, Bubba got side tracked with Andy, he thinks they
should pull Andy out, Andy said he was okay, Bubba said he wouldn’t
want to see him get hurt, Manson said Andy likes to go against the
grain. Bubba went back to Jerry with his story, Jerry said he used a
32 Automatic at a store, he said he just walked in. Spice thinks he
was just for money, jerry said he had two pillow cases, he told the
people to lay down. Bubba decided to get Andy out of the pool and in
to the shower. Joe said he breaks the filter off, Spice called it a
cigarette condom. Bubba said the guys are tied for two beers each, he
thinks Jerry is winning, the guys said it was great tasting beer,
Spice thinks this is like a frat party with old men, Jerry suggested
they fill the pool with four loco, he said they can’t get hammered off
of beer. Bubba suggested the guys just drink it with a straw, Spice
hopes they have crazy straws, Bubba thinks they should throw the drink
concept out altogether. Joe said all he’d like to do is go to a hotel
with his dog, Bubba admonished Tom for dropping the straw. Jerry took
the straw and drank, Bubba said he’s got five dollars to drink right
out of the pool, without the straw, the guys noticed that Jerry has
one eye, Jerry said a seament nail got him, the guys think it makes
him more of a badass, Bubba cracked up when Spice was putting stuff
near Jerry, Spice thinks it’s the worst Spring break party ever, Bubba
told the guys they need to have a mouthful of beer. Bubba told Miller
that they’d leave him with the guys, he thinks the big update will be
when one of the guys has to pee, Spice said that Kevin Harvick is on
the phone, Bubba thinks Kevin would like this kind of stuff, he thinks
the handler wants to talk to Brent Spice said the homeless guys stink,
they then went to commercials a few seconds later.

Segment 6 – Kevin Harvick

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for the BubbaRaw.com live
chat with Bubba on March 24. Bubba said Kevin is a lot like them, he
then recapped Kevin’s record, he said Kevin’s wife is a big Howard
Stern fan, he thinks the phone screener’s job title is to be an idiot.
We then heard a news clip about a Pit-bull that attacked a police car,
Bubba told Portor in St. Pete to hang on, he thinks the dog showing
aggression towards lawn equipment is a problem. Portor said he feels
for Janie Cakes, he said he doesn’t want Bubba to worry about it, he
thinks she’s been pinching the filters off, he thinks she should
switch to filtered cigarettes, he said he can tell Janie is a smoker,
he thinks that’s Bubba’s problem with smoker girls. Bubba thinks he’s
right, he said he hates smoke, he said he’s tried everything, he
thinks maybe this is a wakeup call. Portor said he’s never smoked, he
thinks Bubba telling Jane about smoking will make a big impact, he
thinks Doug clem should make the call, Bubba said no one is getting a
hold of Doug Clem, Ned thinks he’s the only man who can patch the
relationship up. Bubba said he could’ve continued to bite his lip and
keep quiet about it, he thinks turning it in to a Doug Clem put over
fest is a bad idea, he said the listeners have a way to twist things.
We then heard Hogan’s bumper, Hogan said he was sorry to hear about
Jane, Bubba said he’s not flying up there, as Jeff told him not to,
Hogan said it relates to all these health issues, he said he had a
tough time, he said it started when Linda offered Nick one, he said
that upset him more than the cigarette thing, he said he called him
out in Church. Spice wondered if Hogan ever got into cigarettes, Hogan
said he’s probably tried one, Bubba said he’s never seen him do it,
Hogan said he couldn’t stand it. Bubba told Hogan he’s got Kevin on.
Kevin said he heard that, Bubba said Kevin was a wrestler, Kevin said
he held his own, Bubba said that they love Kevin, Kevin said he’d just
ware Tony down, Kevin said that the workout only lasted a few months.
Bubba thanked him for coming on, Kevin said the testing went well, he
thinks the cars drafted well, saying they drove really good. Bubba
asked about the cot wing vs. the spoiler, Kevin said the car acts a
little different. Bubba said people don’t realize that drafting is
about trying to crunch the guy down, Kevin said yes to this, he said
you could air break. Bubba said last year, rcr didn’t work out for
Kevin, he asked him what the difference was, Kevin said everything, he
said everything is running a lot better. Bubba wondered if there’s any
pressure for Kevin, Kevin said no, he said he has to stay really mild
about his emotions. Bubba said Kevin might do his own thing, Kevin
said he’ll have to stay focused on what they’re doing. Bubba said they
used to have the rcr budget, which was no budget, Kevin said his pay
would go down, he thinks Kevin’s wife is worse than Childers. Kevin
then said he’ll be at the Spring Fling, he then explained it. Bubba
asked if Tony brings his own stuff, Kevin said that’s what most of the
guys do, Bubba said Sumo got banned from a race, he then asked Kevin
about the potholes, Kevin said he hung out on the pit locker the whole
time. Bubba asked what the fans were like when he took over
Earnhardt’s car, Kevin said it was different, he said the fans
respected him. Bubba asked about Kevin’s bar, Kevin said they have a
lot of fun at home, he said they drink some beers down there. Bubba
asked if it’s strange growing up in the Carolinas, Kevin said it’s
Culture shock, he said he’s been there for about ten or eleven years,
Bubba thinks he’s close to Selzy, he then asked if Kevin was at the
Prelude, Kevin said it’s a 180 to do that. Bubba said Kevin has an
amazing combination with his wife, Kevin said the nationwide races are
fun. Bubba said they were dialed in pretty good, Kevin said the cars
very hard to control. Bubba said he’s tired of seeing the 48 car
winning, Kevin said he’s tired of it. Bubba said he feels bad for
Tony, as he has to deal with Danica, Kevin said she’s fiery, bubba
said she’s hot, he thinks she has a lot to learn, he then asked Kevin
his thoughts on the Carl Edwards situation, Kevin said he grew up
getting in trouble, he said it’s okay. Bubba asked who the toughest
guy in NASCAR is, Kevin said he wasn’t sure, Bubba thinks Mark Martin,
he thinks Kevin should’ve beaten Montoya, he then asked who the
drivers that Kevin groans at, Kevin said Roby Gordon races every lap.
Bubba thinks Kevin did the race in Vegas, he said Clare B. Lang drives
him crazy, Kevin said he was just trying to help Danica, he said
you’ve got to lay low, he went on to say that he wasn’t up on Twitter
for a while, Bubba said he was the same. Kevin said his website is
Kevinharvick.com, his Twitter page is twitter.com/keinharvick. Bubba
said he never realized how mall Tony was until he stood next to Hogan
for a picture. They then went to commercials a few seconds later.


Segment 7 – Hulk Hogan Calls in

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for the BubbaRaw.com
dollar preview. Bubba thanked Captain Thunder for the Kevin Harvick
hookup. Bonnie from Buffalo Grove came on upset about Jane, Bubba told
her to hang in there, as it would bring him down. Bubba said Hogan got
into the ring with Tyler, he said Tyler has no idea how special he has
it, he then called up Hogan, we then heard one of his bumpers, Bubba
thanked Hogan for showing Tyler some stuff, Hogan said he was the guy
who walked away with a big grin, he said Tyler looks like a super hero
in the ring, he said he’s never seen a seven year-old with that kind
of a body. Hogan thinks instead of playtime, will Tyler bring his
friends over to the gym, Bubba said no to that. Hogan said he
understands what Goldberg was saying, he said he did a good job for
being in the spot for a short time, he said he’s still a mark who is
learning every day, he said you’ll never know what will happen. Spice
said people forget about wrestling, he thinks Honky Tonk man didn’t do
well with his money, Hogan thinks he’s a bad example. Bubba said Hogan
is almost too honest, he thinks people don’t know how hard it’s been
on him, Hogan said what people realize is trying to spend a lot of
money to keep his son out, he said there’s a lot of things that
happened, he said it’s all good. Bubba thinks Hogan never would’ve
imagined anything like this, he said if someone told him ten years ago
he’d get divorced, he wouldn’t believe it, he thinks Hogan is on a
9.75 on a 1-10 shakedown scale, he thinks all Hogan wants to do is be
done with all this, he then said Steve Hurly is a great guy, he then
said Hogan likes to go to the dentist without medication, he thinks
Hogan loves Bubba more, he thinks Spice is a crap stirrer, they then
went to commercials a few seconds later.

Segment 8 – Manson’s new bit, various news clips

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for the Bubba Army hard
Hat, then into “Won’t Get Fooled Again” as bumper music, he then said
they can’t have peeing on the air, he thinks the old Bubba would’ve
broadcasted it, he said taking it out wouldn’t be that much of a deal.
Spice said they took Andy out of the pool, jerry and Joe were battling
it out for money, Joe let it ride, he then decided to leave. Jerry sat
in the pool and is still there, Spice said Jerry is loving it.
Bubba said they’ve got some extra Bubba Wonkas, he said when they’re
gone, they’re gone, he went on to say that Manson has a new offering,
he said a lot of people have been piling on, he said he’s being
respectful to his Mom’s wishes,
Spice said there’s nothing to do. Bubba thinks it’s a slippery slope,
Spice said you can’t make everyone happy. Manson said he did this bit
yesterday, he said had to stew on it, Bubba said he’s not sure on
Jane’s status, he thinks she would want nothing more to be goofed on,
Manson said Jane is the best. We then heard the offering called “Jane
and Doug Clem”, Bubba thinks the haters are going to come out, he
wonders if they should even play it, Manson said it’s ragging on Doug
Clem. In the song, Manson sings about Jane and Doug’s relationship,
Bubba was cracking up at the song, he thinks he would’ve been a goner
had abortions been legal, he told Ned he wouldn’t be who he was
without him, he thinks he’s narrating the bit, he thinks Jane would
like this, he wishes Doug would’ve had a heart attack, Ned thinks a
heart attack wouldn’t take one. We then heard a news clip about a
plane that was making an emergency landing, it hit a jogger as it was
coming in. We then heard a news clip about Charlie Sheen, Spice thinks
he has a lot of balls. We then heard news clip about a guy who beat up
a woman because she turned him down, the guys goofed on one of the
people in the clip, Bubba thinks they should beat him silly, Spice
thinks they should double the punishment. We then heard a news clip
about a two year-old who was killed over spilled milk, Manson thinks
it’s the boyfriend, he thinks Spice is a taking time bomb, Bubba
thinks Spice only cares about his loins, Spice said he was right
there. Bubba told Spice if he ever beat a kid like that, he’d kill
him, he then said Doug Clem would slap a kid across the face for doing
that. Manson said Berlin used to spill her milk at the table, Spice
and Bubba recreated how Donna would handle the situation. Bubba said
Tyler spilled some stuff, he said if you’re going to beat your kid for
spilling milk, you shouldn’t have kids, Manson thinks they should both
be shot. Spice said she could’ve taken the kid to the hospital, he
thinks it’s a fat white bitch. The guys wished Jane well, they then
ended the show a few seconds later.


3 Responses

  1. Amanda Knutson

    Question when and where can people buy tickets for the Calgary show!? Let me know thanks!

  2. Drew Frank

    is there a date set yet for Calgary?

  3. Nicole

    Thanks Drew! Is there a date for Calgary yet???

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