Tuesday, December 07, 2010

December 7th, 2010 by Staff

Tuesday, December 07, 2010

Recap by Blind Lawrence

This recap goes out to Stephanie Koljonen, Breanna Jones, Courtney
Sturgeon and Courtney Jones, as they have all won the Twelve Boobs of
Christmas contest. Congratulations ladies!

Segment 1 – Don Meredith rip

The guys talked about Don Meredith’s death, Bubba then admonished
Brent for messing up a score, he called him dyslexic, Manson as
Springsteen then goofed on him a little for that. Bubba said that he
hasn’t played any bits in a while for some reason; he then said that
he needs to be out of there by 10:15. They then went to commercials a
few seconds later.

Segment 2 – Twelve Boobs of Christmas – Stephanie Koljonen

Bubba came on saying that around this time of day, he gets hot flashes
for some reason, Ned thinks its menopause. Bubba said that Tyler is
more than likely not listening to the show, he thinks that this will
be the last year with Santa, Manson isn’t sure what it’s like for kids
these days, Spice likes how the news will track Santa’s sleigh, he
said that if he can’t believe the news on that, then he’s not sure
what to believe in. Bubba announced for Stephanie Koljonen to call in.
George came on saying that the CFO of Sirius has been saying that
Howard needs to take a pay cut if he wants to stay, Brent said he’ll
monitor Howard’s show. Bubba said that it seems like Tyler isn’t
interested in Santa anymore, he then recapped what happened on Sunday
afternoon, Tyler suggested they watch football. Bubba said that Julia
came to him and said she knew Santa isn’t real, he then said that he
had a hard time figuring out some Math problems, Spice thinks they’re
not on the same playing field. Stephanie Koljonen came on, Bubba
wondered her last name was about, she said it’s Finnish, she said this
is the first year of her doing it, Bubba congratulated her, he then
plugged Mike’s Pizza, he said Ned has six of his sandwiches, he then
wondered if the guys did their bucket lists, they all said yes,
Jabberjaw said that she wasn’t asked to do one, but she’ll have one.
They then went to commercials a few seconds later.

Segment 3 – emails, Chicken dip update

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for “Toys for Tatas”,
followed by “Rape Me” by Nirvana, Bubba joked that this is the guy
from Wiki Leaks. Rick in Ft. Meyers said he’s not a big NASCAR fan,
but he has a friend who has a terminally ill daughter; Tony Stewart
flew down to take the kid hunting. Bubba said that recently, ATNT was
voted the worst service; Spice said he couldn’t argue with that. Bubba
said that if you’re local, you can use Tiger Lilies (813-948-0247), he
then plugged ProFlowers.com, he said they’ve got some great service,
Manson said that sending flowers to a woman at work is always great.
Spice said he got a little bit of heat yesterday over the caller who
claimed that he had slept with another woman. Bubba said that the next
guy wanted a Janie Cakes update; he said the guy won’t be getting one,
as he’s in a huge battle with the family, he thinks he should be like
Manson a little more. The first email of the day said that Q Fm is
doing a toys for Tatas event, Spice said that BJ shay ripped them off
by putting a gong in the studio. Bubba asked for Ned to gong him,
Spice said it was week. Another emailer said they went to North East
Juilers, the emailer thanked Bubba for the hookup, Bubba said he heard
that Jack Stiefel wants to buy his old gold, he said he’ll give jack
the first right of refusal for it, he then got distracted with a woman
who looks like a clown on TV. Another emailer said they were recently
diagnosed with testicals cancer. Another emailer sent a picture of a
Weather girl in Seattle, Bubba thinks she could have Kankels. Brian
said he was listening to Howard’s show, he said Gary was talking about
them, Bubba said he loves Gary. Another emailer asked if any places in
Orlando have the chicken dip, Bubba said he has good news about that
coming up. Another emailer said that Teto Ortiz has a “Punishment
Army” shirt, that is a direct rip-off of the Bubba Army logo. Another
emailer asked for a shed hookup, Bubba said Florida shed is where they
went to. Another emailer asked for information on Cream, Spice said
it’s GivemeCream.com. We then heard the chicken dip update bumper;
Bubba got caught off guard with Teto Ortiz’s shirt. Bubba said he’d
like a print out of all the places where you can get chicken dip, he
then read the list of locations where you can get it, Ned likes how
they’re in Key West, Spice thinks Bubba has come full circle, as the
dip is named after him, and has his picture on it. Denis in St.
Petersburg said he saw a neon Bubba Army, Bubba said he knows that
guy. They then went to commercials a few seconds later.

Segment 4 – Twelve Boobs of Christmas – Breanna Jones, Wiki Leaks

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for the Twelve Boobs of
Christmas. Bubba came on saying that they’ll be playing “Bubba Neezer
Scrooge”; he said it represents what he’s going through. We then heard
the bit from “N.F.C”, track 23, “bubba’s Holiday classics Vol. 1”,
track 9, and “The holiday CD” disc 1, track 1. The bit is a spoof of
Charles Dickens’s “A Christmas Carol”, with Bubba as Scrooge, and
Spice and Brent as his workers. Bubba tells them they can go home to
spend Christmas with their families, under the condition that they
don’t get paid, adding that they drop the English accents. Ned plays
all three ghosts, sniffing blow the whole time. In the past, we learn
the family can’t stand Bubba for fucking the shop vac. In the present,
various BRN members voice there disgust with Bubba. In the future,
Twenty-five Cent is pissing on Bubba’s grave, showing his disgust for
being the token guy to say nigger. Bubba asks Ned if it’s too late to
change, Ned said he has to go take a shit. Bubba wakes up and, after
learning its Christmas day, he hales a taxi to Manson’s Christmas
party. He wishes everyone there a merry Christmas, however the
celebratory atmosphere is short lived. After inviting the party goers
to go to the Dollhouse with him, he gets denied, reverting back to his
old ways, telling everyone to fuck off. He leaves in a huff, only to
come back and say “Fuck tiny Tim Too”, the bit closes with an
announcer saying the bit was brought to you by Levitra, “Help keeping
your cock hard for the holidays”. Bubba said that they were number one
in West Palm Beach, Spice said they’re not on their anymore, he said
the signal wasn’t all that great, he then announced that Breanna Jones
has an hour to call in. We then heard a news clip about rising gas
prices, Bubba said they talked about this yesterday, he said that it’s
all a big shakedown, he said that nothing is real, he thinks the news
person didn’t have the vag to say it was a shakedown. We then heard a
clip of Kathy Griffin calling Bristol Palin fat, Bubba doesn’t like
how the USO guys booed her for that, he then retracted what she said,
he doesn’t like how the news embellishes stuff, he then told Ned that
today is Larry Byrd’s birthday, Ned said he loves him. Ed in
Jacksonville came on; Bubba thinks he beat him to the punch with that.
We then heard a clip of a FCC rep talking; Bubba thinks its horrible
quality. We then heard the Twelve Boobs of Christmas bumper, Breanna
Jones came on saying she had about 14 text messages on her phone.
Bubba thinks he’ll need the guys to give him the story about the guy
who ejaculated from a TSA pat down, Brent said he can send it again.
Bubba thinks Kevin Hayslett would have a field day with this story, he
then called him up, he joked Kevin could make a video out of that,
Kevin said that the crime has to deal with the intent, he thinks this
case won’t fly at all, Bubba joked that Kevin has more videos than
mtv, as they don’t run videos anymore, he then went on to say that
their thinking about taking Wi Fi out of the planes, Spice thinks
it’ll be gone before we know it, Bubba thinks they’re going to cripple
business y doing this. Dale said that as a normal guy, you need to
take off the juilery; Spice said the piercings don’t set off the metal
detector. We then heard a news clip about Wiki Leaks releasing some
documents, Brent said the guy just turned himself in. We then heard a
clip of Ron Paul saying how we need more of Wiki Leaks, Manson said
he’ll never take his “Ron Paul for President” bumper sticker off his
car. Bubba thinks if the media is telling us the same information from
Wiki Leaks, he thinks it wouldn’t be any different, he then read about
the Wiki Leaks founder getting arrested for rape, he thinks the rape
is just a concoction to dirty the guy up, he thinks Spice should work
for the Government, he thinks Spice would be dead if he was in Sweden.
They then went to commercials a few seconds later.

Segment 5 – Twelve Boobs of Christmas – Courtney Sturgeon, Bucket
list, various callers

Bubba said that someone wanted to hear “You’re a Mean One Mr. Clem”,
he thinks Janie Cakes suggested it. Matt in Tampa suggested the movie
“Zeitgeist”, Bubba said they’ve seen it, the guy said he listened to
before, Ned thinks the guy is a douche, Spice thinks MJ doesn’t like
it, Bubba told the guy to flip back. We then heard “You’re a Mean One
Mr. Clem” from “N.F.C” track 15, and “Ned’s Misc Hits Vol. 1”, track
7. The bit is a parody of “You’re a mean One Mr. Grinch”, and
admonishes Bubba and says, among other things, that he’s a triple
Decker asshole, armpit, bullshit sandwich, with a side of smegma
sauce. Bubba said that they’ll try to call Larry Byrd, if they can’t
get him, they’ll play the call from last year, he then said that Larry
Byrd loved the time when Ned took the Lazy Days RV, he then called
Larry, he thinks it was a miracle that they got through last year. Ned
ended up leaving a message, where he calls him the pale prince, Bubba
likes when Ned works smart. We then heard the call from last year,
where Ned sings “happy Birthday” to Larry. We then heard Manson’s
“White Guys in the NBA”, which isn’t in the catalog, followed by “Fire
Flies” by Owl City, Bubba said that he just wants to frolic, Manson
thinks maybe they should do it for the first hook Brent and Spice
suggested the same thing. Bubba announced for Courtney Sturgeon to
call in, as she has won the contest.

Brent’s bucket list for 2011

1. Finish and publish Bubba book
2. Get physically healthy
3. Finish bachelor’s degree
4. Get Mother’s business off the ground
5. Get Bubba’s TV deal back on


1. Have his own reality show
2. More blow
3. Have his own dessert
4. Live to see 2012
5. Shoot large game animals


1. Family only spring break to the Bahamas
2. Get down to 245
3. Complete new BRN
4. N bed by 9
5. Complete book

We then heard Grady Judd’s custom tymbal, Grady came on saying that if
anyone wants to smuggle pot through the county, they’ll get turkey for
Christmas, he then thanked the Bubba Army for helping them out with
catching some robbers.


1. Visit Amsterdam
2. Coasta Rica
3. Complete a tattoo piece
4. Make more money
5. TV


1. Team sports
2. Home studio
3. Do more stand up
4. Get high and write more
5. Do more Father son things


1. Go to Vegas
2. Start working out
3. Worry less about the family
4. Manage time better
5. Learn to shoot a gun

Bubba said that he’ll hook her up with that, he thinks she’s spending
too much time at the show he thinks that’s what killed Dave Rice. We
then heard the 12 Boobs of Christmas winner, Courtney Sturgeon came
on, Bubba congratulated her. We then heard a news clip about Elizabeth
Edwards having a few weeks to live, S[ice said John Edwards is a
scumbag, bubba thinks you can’t put a timeline on getting laid after
the woman has died. We then heard a news clip about Bristol Palin
dissing Margaret Cho, Bubba wonders what the reporter just said. We
then heard a news clip about a woman who beat up a coach for cutting
her daughter, Bubba thinks this is a South Park episode, he then took
a call from a woman who said she called in for some tickets a few
weeks ago, but didn’t get them, Bubba apologized for doing that, he
offered her Orlando Magic tickets, she said that she flashed Tuddle,
Bubba said it was that girl, Spice thinks she’s not that hot. Bubba
thinks he should throw it to the listeners, Ned yelled for the kid to
be shut up. Tuddle came on, the woman said that Tuddle said she could
come to Tampa, Ned got on the bullhorn and yelled for the kid to shut
up, he then called her a stupid whore, he thinks she’s a horrible Mom,
Bubba was cracking up at all this, the delay was hit as she had
cursed, Tuddle said that it looked like she was going to run into
them, the woman thinks Tuddle is full of crap. Ned yelled for her to
check on her kid, Tuddle sad that she was drinking coffee and smoking
a Cigarette, the woman is convinced Tuddle is a liar, she said she’s
not trailer trash, Ned thinks she’s busted. Bubba said he’ll throw it
over to the listeners; he thinks Ned shouldn’t have the bullhorn.

1. Derrick – no
2. Brandon – no
3. Mike – no
4. Kevin – no
5. Dave – yes
6. Jared – no
7. Matt – no
8. Jeremy – no
9. Tommy – no
10. Jim – yes
11. Amanda – no
12. Rob – no

Dur9ing the voting, Jose in Miami suggested she go to the strip club,
he turned out to be a prank caller. The woman said she’s a good
person, Bubba thinks she’s an over baring, ned got on the bullhorn
again, the woman was heard crying, Bubba thinks she’s a bag full of
emotions, the guys then suggested they hook her up with Twenty-five,
the woman said that her guy wouldn’t like that, Ned thinks the guy is
racist. The coocoo sound effect was heard in the background, Bubba
thinks her flashing isn’t Mom of the year material, Ned then goofed on
her via the bullhorn, Bubba thinks he was the visionary for hanging up
on her earlier, she then got the Evil treatment, he thinks they should
take the bullhorn from Ned. They then went to commercials a few
seconds later.

Segment 6 – Various stuff, Twelve Boobs of Christmas – Courtney Jones

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for the Twelve Boobs of
Christmas. Bubba announced that Courtney Jones has won the contest. We
then heard “Rudolf the Red Bud Reindeer” from “bubba’s Holiday
Classics Vol. 1”, track 14, and “the Holiday CD” disc 1, track 6. The
bit parodies the story of “Rudolf the Red Noised Reindeer”, and has
Rudolf and Herby the elf interested in weed; they end up on the island
of misfit sex toys, wishing that Santa would crash and burn. Bubba
came on saying paper tongues were just in town; Spice said he saw them
on Sunday. Bubba then went over the top 10 douchebags of the year, the
guys think David Arquette is miss understood, Bubba thinks Mel Gibson
could be number one on the list, Manson said Mel is an a-hole. We then
heard Richard Marx’s song about John mayor from March 19, 2010, Spice
said he’s a great guest. Bubba requested Richard’s version of “Staying
Alive”, Manson said he loved him. Bubba said it’s the biggest turn
around on the show; he thought Richard would be a nerd. We then heard
Richard’s version of the song, also from March 19, 2010. We then heard
the Twelve Boobs of Christmas bumper, Courtney Jones came on, Bubba
congratulated her, he then read the top 10 reality stars, Manson
wishes they’d all die. Bubba read that the Federal Reserve printed up
money, but all of it had to be thrown away, Brent said Snopes claims
it was fake. We then heard a clip of a senator saying the lame duck
period is rigged; Bubba thinks Vince McMahon might be the President.
They then went to commercials a few seconds later.

Segment 7 – Various stuff

Bubba came on saying that they should play a Christmas bit; Ned said
he’s working on an Apocalypse Ned bit right now. We then heard
“Apocalypse ned – Christmas in Vietnam” from “Apocalypse ned Classics”
track 5, “ned Only” track 10, and “The Holiday CD” disc 1, track 9. N
the bit, Ned remembers the time he dropped some Mescaline, then got
into a fire fight against the VC. After coming down from his high, he
then hides in a Tiger pit, only to be surrounded by the VC. He then
decorates a tree with human ears as a Christmas tree, he then wrestles
with a VC. After a standoff, the bells from a nearby town sounded
Midnight. They both celebrate Christmas for the day with a flask of
Jim Bean and pictures they had. The next day, Ned slices the guy’s
throat from ear to ear, then fire bombs his village. Nick in Road
Island, Bubba thinks he’ll have an announcement, Nick said that Pauly
D is a big douchebag, as he went to high school with him. Bubba said
the new Bubba Army application comes out soon, Brent said it’s free.
Bubba said that Ned’s new shirt is out, it’s the Ned hardly Ned
Fliction shirt, Ned said he’d like 13, Bubba said they could do that,
he thinks they should send some to Larry Byrd. Auggie came on saying
“Car Blonch Tuesday”, he said he’s not eating today, so he can have
room for drinks, Bubba thinks Auggie should make appearances at Scene
on Tuesdays, he then said he has to leave early, he thinks they should
ride out with the new Springsteen bit, he then said that Bronco Rick
isn’t doing so good, they then went to commercials a few seconds

Segment 8 –

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for “Toys for Tatas”.
Spice said that they’ll be getting out. Manson explained the
Springsteen bit, he heard the original and decided to incorporate the
show into it.

1. Big dick – vibrating butt plug of marijuana
2. Pantera – hired to screen letters
3. Brent – pooped on the floor
4. Twenty-five – wants color in Christmas
5. Jabberjaw – misses David Rice
6. Miller – a contract for a six dollar bar tab
7. Bubba – Wants to be Santa
8. Chaz and Al-kida – a role in “Two Jabrones and one cup”
9. Spice – questions Santa’s job
10. Sluggo – got nervous and chickened out
11. Ned – said he’d like to fuck Rudolph
12. Manson – considered to be hotter than Jesus, he then tells the
guys the bit is over

They then ended the show a few seconds later.

One Response

  1. Jake the Jarhead in PA

    Bubba and the Gang,

    Hey, love yas. Please let JabberJaw know that I would be more than happy to make her a gunfighter. No, I won’t teach her to shoot, I’ll make her a gunfighter.

    A shooter can stand at a firing line, aim, and hit the bullseye. A gunfighter can shoot, move, and communicate. A shooter aims at bullseyes. A gunfighter aims at vitals.

    For the record, I found y’all while stationed at MacDill back in your 98 Rock days around 1999. I’m up in Pennsyltucky now, but still tune in everyday via Sirius.

    Thanks for keeping a Marine sane while stationed on an Air Force Base. Semper Fi, Brent. LYIANFW.


    Warning: self-promotion follows.
    P.S. I’m well-read, a 2x combat vet, verbally gifted (verbally, not orally, Ned) and a mark for you and Howard. I’ve tended bar in 3 different countries, bought hookers in 7 different countries. Still in the reserves (they call me Gunny). Security, male-female relationships, world affairs, military, drugs, current events, motorcycles (H-D) are all areas in which I can speak easily. Willing to relocate. I show up on time and get it done. Got a job for me?

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